Attitude, Chronic Illness, Health, Perspective

Chronic Illness: Missing Things and Making the Best of It

Don’t worry, and don’t kick yourself forever. Just take the opportunities when they come.”

albert brooks

As I am writing this post one of my younger cousins is getting married. Yes, literally the ceremony is taking place right now! I am not there, but I am making the best of it.

Autumn sunset bride and groom sitting by a pond photo by on unsplash

FOMO Due to Chronic Illness

I had been planning for months to go to the wedding, and very much looking forward to seeing all of my cousins, aunts and uncles. Most of all, I wanted to be there for S & A’s special day. As the RSVP deadline loomed, however, I realized that my health was too unpredictable at this point. In fact, the act of getting ready to go to a wedding would likely wipe me out, let alone going to the event.

Deciding how much energy, strength, pain, and in my case hemoglobin you will have weeks ahead of an event is difficult to say when you have a chronic illness. I went back and forth about what to do, but decided that I had been on a downward trend at that point. In my heart I knew that I would feel more guilty about the cost to the bride and groom reserving me a place and having to back out at the last minute than my Fear of Missing Out.

It turns out that I made the correct decision. The past few days I have been feeling quite sick to my stomach and having a great deal of weakness and pain in my legs. I told my sister last night that I was glad I had made the tough decision not to go as I would have been a mess today. That being said, all day today I have had that sad feeling that I am missing out on a joyous family occasion.

Making the Best of Missing Out

Fortunately for me, my sister and bestie is at the wedding! And, we live in an age of unprecedented telecommunications technology. She is being good enough to text me all the action as it happens, including photos when it is appropriate to send them. This is so heartwarming for me! I feel that while at arms-length, I am still part of the occasion.

The only thing better would be to livestream the whole thing… I’m sure this will become more common in the coming years! At this point I am pleased to be receiving the lovely pix from my sister.

Don’t Use Your Illness as an Excuse to Isolate Yourself

Part of me worries that I will stop planning to go to big events, like my cousin’s wedding today. But the point of our daily struggle to survive our illnesses is to LIVE our lives. I am still going to try to plan for big events in the future and I hope that if you live with a chronic physical or mental illness that you won’t let it stop you either.

While it is true that sometimes we will miss out, I am grateful for the things I do get to participate in! I know that when I do go to events, I appreciate them so much more than I ever did before my illness. I am just going to keep making the best of it!

Congratulations to my cousins S & A on their wedding day! Keep the pix coming sis!

Please excuse the frantic nature of this post! I wanted to write this in the moment so that it comes across as real and honest as possible…. Ceremony should be wrapping up shortly!

Does you chronic illness make you feel like you are missing out? What strategies do you use to remain connected and avoid FOMO?

4 thoughts on “Chronic Illness: Missing Things and Making the Best of It”

  1. So sorry that you did not make it physically to this event but really glad that technology has at least let you feel that you are with them in mind heart and soul. Keep positive and live those moments you can so they will be worth remembering. My thoughts and prayers are with you!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey lovely. Think my comment that I left the other day may have gone to your spam folder. I saved it just in case so I’ll paste it here –

    Aww congrats to your cousin on the wedding! I know what you mean with the FOMO and all the regrets, also feeling like you’re letting people down, it’s tough. I’m sorry you couldn’t go but they’ll know you would have wanted to and were there in spirit, so to speak! Technology definitely comes in handy for this sort of issue though – hope you got plenty of updates & photos. 😊
    Caz xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi Caz, thank you for reading and resending your comment, you are correct that I didn’t see it (note to self to check spam folder regularly). Thank you also for sharing your thoughts, it is good to know we are not alone with these feeling. I got lots of updates right to the end of the night, which I loved!! Then the next day saw video snippits and lots of photos on Facebook; not the same as being there but still wonderful!

      Grateful to you for stopping by and connecting 😀

      Liked by 1 person

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